Will Martial Arts Turn my Child into a Bully
Aug 27th, 2008 by admin
I was eight years old when I first started studying Karate. At that time it was just ‘karate’. Not Tae Kwon Doe, or Aikido, or Chung Moo Doe, etc. It was America in the 60’s and we didn’t know much about styles of Karate or subsets of martial arts. We knew Karate and Judo. That’s it.
I was about 10 when I first beat up a kid on the playground at school. I thought I was pretty tough, I knew Karate, and I could beat up whoever I wanted. Well, here’s the thing that is still (nearly 40 years later) a huge source of shame for me. The kid I beat up was a girl. Granted, she was older and bigger than me, but my Sensei had taught me not to hurt anyone unless except in self defense. I was more than shamed. I skipped class for two weeks, and avoided the dojo like the plague.
Finally, my father found out, and instead of disciplining me himself, took me to Takasan, my Sensei. Takasan told me a story about himself when he was a small child. He did almost exactly the same thing as me. He got into a small altercation with another child at school, and ended up breaking his arm. His Sensei (not his father) in turn, broke both my Sensei’s arms. Okay, this is a little barbaric for our times, but remember that this was over 70 years ago when my Sensei was a child. And this was Japan, where brutal punishment was somewhat common.
For months, my Sensei had to have his father help him get dressed, go to the bathroom, eat, everything. It was horrible for him, and taught him an enormous lesson.
So back to the purpose of this article. While I don’t think that every child will turn into a bully just because he or she knows Karate, I do think that when faced with a situation where a child can show his or her superiority, there is a chance that they will take things too far. Whether this will turn into a child becoming a bully will depend mostly on his or her teaching.
When I was ten I made a mistake. Luckily, I didn’t do much other than give someone a bloody nose. But I felt horrible about it. And typical of a 10 year old, I hid instead of apologizing to the girl, my father and my Sensei. But still, I didn’t turn into a bully, didn’t continue to hurt kids just for fun, and didn’t show off my superiority by pushing people around. In fact most kids thought I was a little kid and couldn’t defend myself. Little did they know.
So if you’re worried about your child becoming a bully just because they have the ability and knowledge to defend themselves and do harm to someone else if necessary, put that worry aside. They won’t suddenly change their stripes and start beating everyone up. In fact, they probably will have more respect for others and will be more apt to let things slide. But be sure you find a good, centered, respectful Sensei, a Dojo that teaches respect for others. Teach your child respect with strength and your child will become a better person, happier and more centered but with inner strength and ability.
Scott Taylor is a noted author and prolific write of many resources such as Martial Arts, Herbal Remedies, and Real Estate Investing. His various websites provide information on a variety of subjects and topics.
www.honestyreviews.com/martialarts/